Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid is playing this Healthcare end-game all wrong.

Harry is acting like an old school Senator. Like a gentleman. Albeit a gentleman who cheats at golf and poker, but still a gentleman. Harry is playing by the Senate rules. He is all inside politics, making promises, testing different nuances, figuring out how he can jury-rig a meaningful Healthcare bill through the Senate — when he should be ramming it through, and destroying anyone who gets in the way.

Harry has demonstrated already that his attempts to herd the cats that are his colleagues isn’t working. If he doesn’t get tough soon, it is going to be more like herding dysfunctional lemmings who can’t even agree which cliff to jump off.

Harry needs to start attacking. And he just doesn’t have the equipment for it.

Yes, I’m saying that Harry Reid doesn’t have a Dick.

There comes a time when America needs a big Dick. And Harry ain’t swinging one.

I think we can all agree that Dick Cheney is a powerful attack Dick. He is brutal and relentless. A Dick with no conscience. But a trickier Dick might be even better.

I believe the Dems need a Dick Nixon to step up to the plate. And he needs to a serving Senator. Keith Olbermann and Alan Grayson just won’t cut it.

The Dems Attack Dick (DAD?) must let America know that Joe Lieberman and the Kill-Americans 40 (aka Republicans) are ruining America, not only on Healthcare but on everything they oppose, which is everything Obama was elected upon.

Unfortunately, Obama has to be the good cop he promised to be. A bipartisan cop. Obama also believes in separation of powers, which means the Senate has to do this by themselves.

If Harry can’t grow his own Dick, my candidate is Chuck Schumer. Chuck is a New Yorker and I think we can all agree that New York produces the Biggest Dicks In The World,

When we get a big Dem Dick, he needs to go on the attack and not let up. Inside the party and outside. Scorched Earth! Take no prisoners. Our way or the cemetery. All the Dirty Dick Tricks that the Republicans use.

It’s a Dirty Dick, but someone has to swing it.

I’ve got a friend… Stop smirking. That’s not the joke here.

My friend is one of those people who would rather score points in a conversation rather than win the argument and actually get something done.

Conversations with him are like fighting Mohammed Ali. He is always on the verbal move, sticking and jabbing. Moving like a butterfly. Stinging like a sweat bee.

He had a fabulous job at one time, but he spent all his time there talking about his revolutionary ideas, fighting with bosses about them, and in the after-work bull sessions hammering his points home with co-drinking, co-dependant co-workers.

Of course, he doesn’t have that job anymore. But that’s okay. He can go for an hour straight at the mention of the job, telling his current conversational backboards why he was right. And how even after he got canned, he got the best of them verbally.

Why did this pop into my head? Because I”ve been listening  to Republican leaders like John The Boner and Eric Can’t, and the FixedNews talking heads. These GOP-brains are now making big noises about healthcare. Jabbing this and jabbing that. Scoring points against the Dems, their spending, and their healthcare plans.

These are the same tough muthas that were slamming P.Bam over his “soft” comments on Iran. This was before the Iranian election and the demonstrations and the splits in the Iranian regime which have validated the soft-spoken US policy.

Why do Republicans seem to want to score loud points rather than quietly win? Why would they want America to make big loud noises about supporting “democracy” rather than doing what was best for the Iranian democracy, which was of course, to shuthefckup, and not give the Ayatollahs a chance to claim the violence was a plot of the “Great Satan”.

In that round, the GOP-brains scored the points on Obama, but America and democracy won.

Now it’s Healthcare. Big noises with big nos. Are they scoring points? You bet. P.Bam’s numbers are down. The popularity of a new healthcare bill (whatever the hell it is going to be) is down.

The GOP-brains are getting the best of the argument. But they are doing nothing to help America get a better healthcare system.

But you have to admit, they are scoring points. Go Team!